you know, i've never been interested in flowers or stuff like that. but i read something, and even though it doesn't content anything about flower, it actually made me interested haha -__-
to this wonderful flower (i guess), blue daisy.

NEW SPIRIT \m/

okay kemaren saya banyak cakap sama farah di chatting jadi seperti nya saya merasa lbh baik untuk menghadapi januari huehehehehehehehhe...
hmm dan tmn sekelas gw disini td sms happy new year (padahal masi brp jam lg wkwk) but she's so cuteee so that makes me really happy
i absolutely got to share what the hell i've been doing for this 10 days holiday.

1. MOVIES
you know what? bapak gw is the best wkwkwk sebelum liburan me and him and my lil bro udah siap2 menghadapi liburan jd kami donlod melambaaaaaaaaaak film. gw nonton:
Tangled, How to train your dragon, Despicable me, Harry Potter 1-7, The sorcerer's apprentice, Megamind, A Christmas Carol, Monster vs Aliens, Oliver Twist, The Last Airbender, and for the 2nd time: Alice in Wonderland, Princess and the Frog, Shrek Forever After.
Isn't that amazing? XD

2. FOOD
keluarga gw berencana franchise-ing you know haha.. jadi kami nyoba bbrp restoran. yg terpenting: JANGAN PERNAH SEKALI PUN PERGI KE RESTORAN YG NAMANYA: DESA DESA. asli kami ga bakal datang lg buat kedua kalinya. makanannya GA ADA RASA U KNOW! betul2 ga ada rasa. klo mau ke bumbu desa aja. itu mantaps!

3. DLL (MOSTLY TV)
ASLI I LOVE KBS AND MTV. KMRN GW BARU NONTON KBS GAYO DAEJUN DAN OHMAIGOT KYUHYUN CAKEP SEKALI. GANTENG, LUCU, IMUT. AAAAA SEMUA DEH!
trus gw jg banyak baca komik. salah satu favorit gw ini:

ini tuh unyuuuuuuuuuuu bet ceritanya aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. i really really really like it. ada jg satu lg judulnya: Meru Meru Mail. i know judulnya pelik. tp ceritanya hhhhhhhhhhhhh ngegemesin wkwkwk















oke, trus my mom bought me new earring hehe.. i'll upload it later. it's big -_- but my mom said it's not, so did my dad. -_________-

i'm back! kinda...

you know what? 2010 almost ended. well i guess you all have figured it out.
i noticed something quite peculiar about 10 minutes ago
i spent days and days and days thinking bout the past
and now i think i have come to a conclusion, i guess, human brain is complicated so you might want to be not so sure.
ekhem, so..
i miss my pal, good pal actually, i guess that shows.
i want to meet them, that shows too
i really have this positive energy coming to me a few days ago, that i will meet them again.
well now i'm telling you that i'm not so sure anymore. BIG not sure.
the reason is simple: i'm afraid.
now, this word "afraid" i used has a lot of meanings.
i got a lot spaces left so i'll type it all down

first, the greatest fear of all is.... forgot. i am not the kinda person that lose faith easily, and i'm still keeping this faith deep down down down down in my heart. but i'm just a human, obviously, so i have doubt. i didn't have enough faith that after next year i met them (maybe it's the last time i'll meet them) they will still remember me.

second, i am afraid of my jealousy. i have seen pictures, i'm happy seeing them happy, but still there's this little spark inside this human heart, a little spark of jealousy. i can't stop thinking that "i should've been there with them" or "i should have done that together with them" and stuff like that, you got the idea. i'm not happy with that

third, the last one maybe, i'm afraid of myself. you know, when i see those pictures i see something BIG. that they DID NOT change. but i'm afraid that i DID. maybe, i don't know. you can't judge yourself, mate. i honestly think something changed inside of me. but i don't know what it is, and i don't know whether it's a good thing or a bad thing. now, i don't have much positive energy around me lately (i can't even force myself to go to bath) so i have this thought that maybe, BIG maybe, it's a bad thing

you see, i can't even ended this years successfully with no regrets. i have regrets. i have wishes. too many wishes that my mind WILL blow up, literally. i have this mixed up feelings. i have this crumbled string inside my brain. i have this massive school nerve in my heart. and i still have a lot of things i want to say to the Lord, i have a lot of confessions, i have a lot of apologies to be told, i have a lot and lots and lotssss of "thank you" to be spoken. i have a lot of love to be shared.

now when the world seem so pitch black, your only choice is the Lord, and it will be totally great if you have some company besides you. you should be thankful for the people that stays besides you, always.

LIFE

i know. i don't deserve to talk anything about life when i'm still a high school student. but, please, this is my blog.
lihat lah blog gw wkwkwk udah lama ga diurus bet. maaf yaaa :)
gw baru buka blog lg hr ini. mostly krn bosen tp ada kangen jg kok.
begitu ampe dashboard, gw langsung nge-cek apdet2 kan. dan bener aja udah banyak yg nge post lg. yak langsung gw open satu2. daaaaaaaaaaaaan.. men, this brings back thousands of memory.

mulai darimana ya.. hidup gw dh.
jadi gini saudara2.. saya sadar hidup itu BERUBAH. dan saya tau kalau kita tdk bs beradaptasi, kita ga bakalan bs survive. gitu deh katanye.

TAPI.

gw udah punya temen2 disini. bsa dibilang gw emang memaksa diri utk beradaptasi dgn lingkungan. tp gw suka kok tmn2nya. mrk gila + gila + gila. dan baik. tp ada jg beberapa yg dengan bahasa Indonesia yg baik dan benar disebut: mengganggu hidup orang. klo d bahasa gw sih cukup dengan: kayak tai.

TAPI.

emang beda. BEDA itu udah merangkum segalanya men. gile, dan disaat gw ngerasa gw bisa, gw jatoh lagi dan gw menginginkan hari2 yg sudah berlalu itu kembali. gw secukupnya bisa menyadari kalo gw ga bakal pernah bisa balik lg tinggal di malay. dan kalopun gw bisa, gw rasa suasananya bakalan udah beda kan? tp gw bener2 ngerasa gw harus dan HARUS ketemu sama tmn2 gw lagi. dan itu mungkin tidak akan terkabulkan dalam jangka waktu dekat. gw benci gw masihlah anak kecil yang belum bisa ngelakuin apa yg gw mau. coba kalo gw org dewasa dan gw udah punya penghasilan, dgn gampang gw bisa kemana aja yg gw mau.

KANGEN itu dulu buat gw cuman perasaan sesaat klo pengen ketemu seseorang krn wkt kelas 3 masuk ampe hr sabtu, ga ketemu tmn2 itu cuman 1 hari bayangin! emang bener apa kata orang kalo kt baru bs ngehargain sesuatu itu kalo udah ilang. bkn berarti gw ga ngehargain, tp BENER2 ngehargainnya itu ya gitu. kalo udah gak ada.

dan di saat2 kyk gini, flashback dtg. dan itu bukan membuat keadaan menjadi tambah baik. yang ada ya kebalikannya.

gw hrs bilang hidup itu ga adil buat org2 kyk gw sama tmn2 gw. dunia ini terlalu.. adel, ira, belin, gw,shara, farah, retna, vinca, uri, murni, nadia, syeril, alya, gayuh itu bener2 udah klop ya. aib itu semua udah tau, semua udah ngertiin satu sama lain. semua udah saling MELENGKAPI. gw ga suka. gw tau itu salah dan harusnya tidak begini. tp men, perasaan gw menang dr otak gw. dan inilah yg gw rasakan:

GW PENGEN KETEMU TEMEN2 GW LAGI.

sebenernya kata2 temen ga cukup. bahkan temen baik pun udah ga bisa gw jadiin status gw sama org2 itu. gw sama mereka itu keluarga tanpa hubungan darah yang bisa saling melengkapi dan menghibur satu sama lain dan tidak mau ada konflik antara satu sama lain.
gw tuh melebihi cinta sama mrk. seumur hidup saya, saya ingin bersama mereka.

kalo gw bisa mendapat kesempatan memberi penjelasan ttg hidup saya:
hidup saya penuh dengan keluarga tanpa hubungan darah saya.

$$$$$

Now people, that IS what we call money.
hehe gw mo nabung. pokoknya nabung nabung nabung.
bulan Maret ntar, kalo Tuhan mengizinkan dan bokap nyokap jg mengizinkan, gw mau ke malay. alone jg gpp. buat nntn Super Show 3 nya Super Junior.
somehow...
yea soalnya ini mungkin kali trakir sblm jangka waktu yg sangat panjang Super Junior bisa manggung :(
aaaaaaa gw dapet mimpi itu mungkin pertanda gw emang harus kesana.
gw blm bilang ke nyokap ato bokap. cari timing dan money dulu dah.
hhhhh..
T_____T
pengen kesana bangeeeeeeeeeeeet

God, tolongin saya ya...

oh ya dan gw lg suka lagu Sum 41 - confusion and frustration in modern times hohoho keren aja.

Confusion's all I see, frustation surrounds me
Solution bid farewell, sedation WHAT THE HELL?

aseek2..
oke deh. gw ga jadi jg ya nge post soal mimpi. ntar2an aja deh klo ada mood. melibatkan terlalu banyak tragedi *apadeh* dan hal2 aneh.
lagi ga mooooooood.

EHEM

blog, i am soooo sorry. it's not that i don't want to update you, but time and the world didn't let me. it's holiday you know. but it's just the same boring day for me.
my holiday started on 9th of September. so today is what? the 4th day i guess. and so the first 2 days of my holiday is pretty lame. i'm stuck in my house. the third day... oh i guess the third is the same. but today! todaaaaay! well i get the hell out of my house. even though it's just shopping with my aunt and cousin -_______-"
but anyway, today is my love Fatina Putri Maulida's birthday!! wooo hoooo
yea that's it. i'm blog-less.
i wanna post about my HELLA FANTASTIC dream, but let me write it in the next post. it's gonna take the whole page XP


Today's pray: God, I'll save my lunch money. I just need you to show the way. I really wanna go to Super Show 3 concert. It may be the last time for me. I don't know how I'm going to make it. So, God.. please show me the way. Amen...

untitled, unthinkable, unsure, un un un :D

actually i want to share a pic today. but the internet connection... -___-
so i decided to just write it here. please note that the blue colour is the original note and the red one is my add-ons.

It's the worst feeling in the world to love and hate
someone or your best friends all at the same time. And it's hard to watch
things change when all you want is for them to stay
the same just like the old times. It's crazy when you want to let go of them so badly, but you
keep holding on, and you want to move on, but you're
stuck right where you started. When feelings come
and go and you can't decide what you want or how you actually feel. When you
have so many things to say, but you don't know where
to start. When you want them in your life so bad, oh so bad but
all you can do is push them farther and farther away and try to make them hate you so you can let them go.
It's so hard to think back to how things used to be and
look at it now and realize that things are different, really different and
they may never ever be the same again. You tell yourself
it's not worth it, yes i keep saying that in my head but if it really didn't matter, you
wouldn't spend so much time thinking about it again and again.

credit goes to: girly-girl graphics and my friend Monique who shared this to me

so, that's it for today.
enjoy your day.

high school

OKEH. saya benar2 merasa pelajaran SMA itu "MENYENANGKAN"
pelajaran ips klo buat gw ga ada masalah sejauh ini. semua hanya mengandalkan memori otak. dan walaupun memori otak saya SANGAT AMAT TERLALU terbatas, ips masih bisa dilalui.
b.indo, b.ing, agama, pkn itu no problem. biologi bahkan gw ga ada masalah

MASALAH nya itu skrg adalah: matematika, fisika, kimia (MAFIA)

mari kita bahas satu persatu
mat: gw bisa matematika, tp guru gw terlalu bagus ampe dy ngasi soal nya bervariasi gt. oke sbnrnya mat bkn masalah sh. asalkan gw ga panik ngerjain nya bakal lancar2 aja. okok mat batal.

fis: hmmm ini jg mngkn sbnrnya bkn masalah. hanya aja gw ga suka gurunya disini. aaah i miss pak kun! tp ribet jg sih ini vektor2 bende. walopun gw suka tp..

kim: nah ini dy masalah sebenarnya. kimia itu bikin botak. saya tidak bohong. saya tidak bercanda. emang lebay tp saya serius. ini masalah. kita harus mencari jalan penyelesaiannya. KALAU TIDAK DUNIA SMA KIAMAT.


ehem.. sepertinya post saya kali ini tidak ada makna nya.. maafkan saya.

yea, anyway MARI SEMANGAT SMA!
percayalah bahwa SMA itu menyenangkan

i wish you all good health and wonderful upcoming days :D




citeh abis.

New Chapter

i guess this is it.
i just realized that maybe I'm the only one who haven't start moving on with my new life here.
and now that i've got my sense back, i'll try to do just that.
won't forget the old beautiful memories. of course i won't. no one can replace them.
but i know now that i have good friends too here.
so i need to let them go.
they have their own life now.
we have two completely different sky now.
i don't really like that fact, but it is the fact.
there's no WE anymore.
just me and THEM.
not the part of their life anymore.
i'm probably being too dramatic. but that's how i feel.
i think i understand now, how does it feels to be apart.
i said goodbye, but that's not goodbye.
i still haven't let them go.
so now, i'm saying this without holding back.

good bye my best friends.
i love you all.

for me love is not just between two persons anymore.
this pure love that i felt is the most beautiful feeling, and i got it from all my friends.

IX A 2009/2010 always in my heart...

PENCIL.

huaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
pensil gw!!!!!
hari ini gw ujian dan pensil mekanik gw! pensil mekanik kesayangan gw dan satu2nya!
ketinggalan di kelas :((
gw takut bsk udah kgk ada lagi. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
sumpah mungkin gini rasanya klo hape gw ilang *LEBEH*
kita udah ngelewatin segalanya bersama! ujian, pr, catatan *LEBEEEH*
gw sayang bgt ama si pensil Pilot ini *LEBYEEEHH*
gw itu cinta banget ama yg namanya pensil mekanik!!!!

hhh.. nasib.. klo bsk gw ga ketemu ma dy, brarti itu nasib gw ma dy.

ok, let's stop all that nonsense *even though some of it does makes sense*
kmrn gw ke gramed dan beli buku Percy Jackson seri ke 3 - 5 (tamat)
tp sayangnya gw blm ada kesempatan bahkan untuk baca halaman pertama -__-"

sekilas info: saya ingin bermain2 gitar kembali.


















bye

10460046

oke. jadi ceritanya gini..
hari rabu minggu lalu gw baru balik dr malay gitu deh. asli seneng bgt bs ketemu tmn2 gw lg. aaaaaaaaa.. gw masi kangen ma mrk

daaan bgitu gw plg ke medan, hari kamis kan gw sklh. udah gituuu yaa bende bende bende, gw dikasi kartu ujian buat hr jumat nya (pekan bulanan I). gw bener2 ga ada merhatiin tu kartu. tp udah gitu plg sklh nya tmn gw ada yg mo liet ruangannya kan, jadi gw bareng ma dy. trss liet posisi duduknya, baru lah gw merhatiin nmr ujian gw.
eeeehhh nmrnya 10460046. yg penting disini itu: 46 nya.
wkwkwkwk
yg tau heboh ya. yg ga ngerti diem aja.
sebenernya sih gw jg ga ngerti what's the big deal.
tp gw pengen ngasi tau ajaa.. secara ini blog udah jarang bgt di update. wkwkwk
nmr ujian gw 46 kan ya..
nmr absen gw 23. setengah nya 46. ckckckck

oh ya, dan td gw seneeeeng bgt. jd nyokap gw lg ke putra gt, pas nunggu kereta api (ktm) di stasiun putra, nyokap ketemu retna.
udah gt nyokap lngsng nelp gw. trs jadinya gw ngmng ma retna. bentar doang sih. kira2 begini:

retna: ireeeeeeeeeeeeeen
gw: retnaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
retna: iren kangeeeeen
gw: iyaaa rettt gw jugaaaaa *air mata mulai menggenang, suara mulai sengau*
retna: aaaaaa jgn nangis lah ren. puasa ga lo
gw: puasa
retna: oke deh ren, gw ga mo lama2. pulsa nyokap lo sih. ok bye reeen
gw: bye reet

tp walo begimanapun gw seneng. udah gt bbrp mnt yg lalu abis webcaman ama pinkaa. hehehe rambut nya panjang benerr

oke gw gatau mo nulis apalagi, jadi bye2

hey

wow, i choosed a bad title didn't i? but whatever. oh man, how long is it since the last time i updated my blog? hahaha... okay, let me explain to everyone that's reading my post: the internet in Indonesia SUCKS REAL BAD. no lie.
okay so i've started my school from like what? 2 weeks ago? yea something lah
the first day: HARSH.
you know what, i gotta hold my tears from the morning till evening. everything is just so different. i don't think i'm ready to adapted myself. it's just, aaaaaaaaaaaaah.. the class, the teachers, the lessons, the classmates. oh God..
I always try my best to keep contacting with my friends, because you know what? i'm afraid.
i'm not afraid of them forgetting me.
but what i'm really afraid of is that i will be the one who forget them.
i don't know, i just can't imagine if someday i won't care even if they're online, i won't care a damn thing to wrote on their wall, i won't miss them anymore.

that is what i'm really afraid of.

that's why i think i never opened up with my classmates here, i don't wanna talk with them. because if i found one or more of them that is kinda fun and cool to be friends with, i might have don't have this feeling of missing KL anymore.

BUT

no. i won't let that happened. even if i have new friends here, i won't forget them.
what my best friends in KL gave me is not only happiness. we've been through a lot of things. and you won't understand it. IT'S.A.LOT. we've been through hard times, good times, BAD times, stupid lessons, stupid stuff, stupid game, stupid talks, cool friendship, bad friendship, feeling of hating, feeling of loving. oh God there's too many :'(

the fact that i won't forget is: our family. Ilegall (apa Illegal?) family. it doesn't matter if even all of them forget about that. i love them. i used to think the word "love" is merely a word. but know, this word "love" can make me cry for the whole week. it gave me this great feeling of missing. the longing that made both of my eyes and heart hurts.

i don't know what to do if one day they forget about me. wait, maybe a suicide?

BRAND NEW

I've got a looooot of new story and i am about to write it in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...

FIRST: NEW HAIRCUT
Actually this is not my plan. absolutely not. i still haven't figured out the hairstyle. just for your information, i like to follow my idols hairstyle and then adjust it to my face and changed it a little bit here and there. BUT my hair was so long a few days ago (to be exact: tuesday) and my mom won't tolerate this inappropriate behavior (lebay -__-)
So, on Tuesday 6th of July, at around 11.30 am my mom forced me to go with her to the salon. i think i still can find my way out of it in the salon. BUT you really can't get away from your mom. as soon as we stepped into the salon, she told the hairstylist
"She's going to have a haircut." -__________-
*dan gw lngsng cemberut sampe selese potong rambut*
at first i don't think it will turn out good, because it's just the same as my old haircut and it's so double lame. but yea it turned out pretty good. so here you go:


okay, to the next stories

SECOND: MALAYSIA!!
where am i? where am i? answer! answer! yup malaysia it is. let's start with the good things: i'm going to meet my friends again, i'm going to release my stress here, i have a super fast internet, i have my old room, i have ktm rather than angkot or becak. and so! to the baaaaaad thing: i missed my first day at school! how cool was that? i have no friends there, i have no idea where is my chair and table, i have no idea who's the teacher is, i have no idea about the subjects and stuffs, i SERIOUSLY know nothing about that school and it's system of teaching -_- i'm panic. oh wait, not just the first day. but also the 2nd, 3rd, and the 4th. HAHA

THIRD: THE CLASSROOM
the good thing about my class and what's inside it is: there's not a lot of chinese people. no hard feelings! what i'm trying to say is, not everyone can speak chinese and write chinese. JUST LIKE ME! so i'm not all that worried about chinese lesson (oh yea how if everyone turns out to be chinese geniuses? i'm dead) the bad thing is: IT'S ON THE FIFTH FLOOR. AND NO LIFT. AND TO GET TO THE FIFTH FLOOR, YOU NEED TO USE THE SIDE LADDER, NOT THE MAIN ONE!!!!!! wherever i am, my classroom is always out of the sight -_-

more stories? STAY TUNED with me, IRENE, on irene is kyuhyun lover ciao!
*apedah -______-*

First Time Grey

sori kalo gw rada lebay, tapi beginilah Irene kalo ada hal2 baru di kehidupannya hehe :D
this is my preparation for being a Senior High School student

Tas baru (check)yg paling gw suka dr tas ini, bawah nya ada tmpt buat sepatu. mantep ga tuh

Sepatu baru (check)

Seragam SMA (check)kgk pake dasii T_T

Hape baru (check)

Secara material:
GUE SIAP SMA! :D

yak, post gw gitu doang hehe

TRAITORS.

Almost all of the people i met IS a traitor.
I'm sick of it.
sick of the fake smiles, fake laugh, fake tears, fake jokes, and yea fake friendship.
do you think i don't have any heart?
well now i'm telling you: I HAVE HEART.
i really think that we're like "forever best friends" but D'OH
you don't even trust me and you ask me to do that?!

my life is pathetic. maybe i don't deserve to have any friends. maybe i'm supposed to be alone.
so, bye now. i hope i'll never see you again.
sayonara...

it's July and i have lost all my new spirit to go to school. just a few days ago i am soooo happy and excited and enjoying my self here. but now? i don't know where that spirit went.
back to the not-in-the-mood-for-anything irene



PS: i REALLY hope i'll never see you again

FRUSTATED

Okay so here's the things:

1. gw pindah ke tempat yg sama sekali ada di list impian gw. gw ga suka tempatnya, gw ga suka sekolahnya. ini sebenernya udah cukup buat bikin org gila

2. gw blm pamit ke bbrp teman gw dan gw gatau apakah gw bs ketemu sama mrk lg ato ga

3. masalah keluarga makin memperburuk suasana

4. gw muak liet buku sedangkan gw mesti ikut tes buat SMA



5. (yg paling bikin gw frustasi *jieeeeee*) gw ama ni orang kyknya ga jodoh. hari ini hp gw mati jadi gw charge di rmh. terus pas mo pergi nih hapenya gw tinggalin aja di rmh. dan selama perjalanan gw ngerasa ga nyaman gt. EH PAS NYAMPE RMH, dia missed call 3 kali T_T tepat di saat gw pengen BANGET denger suaranya. gw tau gw harusnya bersyukur soalnya kemaren dy udah nelp gw malem2 dan lamaaaaaa bgt gw bs nge denger suaranya. tpi it ended so BAD. hape gw mati krn lowbat, dan gw lg kesel ma dy GARA2 HAL SEPELE. omg gw pengen nyeburin diri ke lobang aja dah.
Trus pas lanjut di chatting, ntah knp gw masih ngebet aja kesel ma dy. aaaaaaaaaaa bego bgt dah gw!! kenapa sih ga bisa jujur bilang aja ke dy apalah gt. ih sumpah gw kesel ama diri sendiri

out.ciao.

Blog Award (Again)

walah si Farah Savira ngasi blog award lg nih. kekeke~ (evil laugh) ... tengkyu far!
harus jawab 5 pertanyaan -_-


1. Berapa blog yang kamu punya? dan berapa umurnya ?

sebenernya ada dua. tp yg satu lg udah gw DELETE krn ga jelas gt deh. jadi jawabannya cuman 1 blog :D umurnya? bentar gw liet di dashboard dulu ya.. hmm ga ada di dashboard. di mana yak? di blog archive sih post pertama gw 7 mei 2008. anggep aja bnr. brarti ud 1 thn 44 hari

2. Sejak kapan kamu mengenal dunia blog ?

2 smp

3. Mengapa tertarik membuat blog? dan untuk apa ?

tertarik? karenaaa pengen aja. biasalah namanya jg anak muda, pasti pengen mencoba2. toh menurut gw, apa ruginya? untuk ngelepasin stress, untuk berbagi cerita, untuk menangis bersama (lho?), untuk bermain - main, dan untuk meningkatkan kreatifitas *muntah* . oh ya, dan yg paling penting buat temen2 gw :)

4. Apa kelebihan dan kekurangan blog kamu ?

Kelebihan: gw kalo ganti background pasti keren (menurut gw sih :P) truuuus udah deh. kekurangan: sepi comment wkwk

5. Award dan Tag ini di berikan kepada 5 blogger lain :

haduh, tmn2 gw lagi pada males update blog nih. klo di tag paling taun dpn baru diisi -___-
tp here goes:

- Vinca Rosea -> a.k.a Pinka
- Belin -> The Almighty "Bule"
- Remon -> Chinese boy lol
- Retna -> the FUN
- Far, lu gw tag lg ya :D Farah Savira -> my lovely buddy :)

Back!!

So, here I am. Back to my home sweet home in Malaysia. I greatly miss my mom hehe..
But, now I miss my big bro :(
well I need to see the good things. I will meet my best friends again (hopefully)
oh I'm so excited to meet my friends especially Belin.
I have a little present for her. Haha.. I told her it's a surprise but not really.

Oooooooo

Aaaaaaaa

Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Uuuuuuu

Eeeeeee

Okay, just what the hell...

Now I don't know what else to write except:

GOD I BELIEVE IN YOU AND I KNOW THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, IT'S THE BEST FOR ME.

3 weeks feels like 3 months

it's been 1 week and 1 day since i arrived at Bandung.
and there's still 2 more weeks before i go back to Malaysia.
I reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally miss my Mom and my lil bro.
gw ga pernah selama ini jauh dari nyokap. paling lama pun 1 minggu lah. adek gw apalagi. paling lama 3 hari dah. DAN teman2 gw? itu 2 hari doang paling lama gw ga ketemu mrk. aaa asli gw kangen bgt. kalian blh bilang gw lebay, tp rasa kangen gw ke temen2 gw ini bikin gw ampe mo nangis. gw sayaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang bgt ma temen2 gw mo cewe ato cowo. sedalem2nya deh. ternyata kita emang ga bisa idup tanpa temen ya.
gw ga bisa ngebayangin gmn ntar klo gw pindah. pasti gw bakal nangis sejadi2nya.
tp kemaren kk sodara gw bilang gini: emang sedih ninggalin tmn2, tp kita ga blh selalu ngeliet ke belakang. krn klo kt selalu ngeliat ke blkg, kt ga bisa nge hargain apa yg kita ada skrg

I know. tp ttp aja. susaaaaaaah bgt rasanya ninggalin mrk smua. masalahnya gw ngerasa deket ama mrk bkn cuman sekadar tmn sekelas lg. ga tau deh mrk ngerasa nya gmn. tp yg jelas mrk bnr2 org yg berharga buat gw. dan gw berjanji ama diri gw:
1. gak blh ngelupain siapa pun
2. gak blh sampe lost contact
3. harus usahain ketemuan klo ada kesempatan
4. harus bisa menghargai apa yg gw ada
5. rasa sayang ini ga blh berkurang sedikit pun

nah, gw baru beli baju batik td. wkwkwk akhirnya gw punya bj batik. bsk rencananya pagi gw mo fitness ma kk sodara gw hehe mdh2an jadi deh. trs abis itu mo jalan ma odhi dan ajeng di Ciwalk. hohoho... haduh money tinggal rp50.000 gawat jg nh -___- gw makan yg murah2 aja deh. hahaha

can't wait for 9th of June <3 <3

yo!

gw udah selese nih tes akademik sma 3. GILA ya.
mat nya itu CUMAN 40 soal, 2 jam. TAPI standar nya jauh (gw tekankan: JAUH) dari standar UAN. hahahahahahahahhahhahahaha gw bisa gila. dr 40 brp yg gw ISI? 13. haha -____-
tp ips nya 60 soal 2 jam dan gw ga ngisi 7. lumayan lah. gw udah memasrahkan aja semua nya kepada Tuhan YME.
tinggal besok, udah gt bebas! dan bsk itu jadi wawancara bahasa inggris dan ditanya itu karangan bahasa inggris yg gw bikin kemaren. BAH! sedangkan gw kemaren spontan abis itu nulis nya T_T udahlah ingatan gw 25 kb doang. ga nyampe 1 mb.
tp gw mo postitf thinking! abis bsk, sudahlah. keterima ga keterima, yg penting gw udah usaha :)

people, apa pun yg kalian lakukan, lakukan dengan sepenuh hati dan penuh perjuangan. setelah itu, sisanya biar Tuhan yang tentukan.
*asik apedah gw*

POSITIF, POSITIF! +++++

oh, man!

hey people. hr ini gw ikut tes akademik buat sma 3 (IPA, english (TOEIC dan Writing), english (writing (lagi))
gila ya bangun jam 5 pagi, udah gt 6.30 brangkat dr rmh, soalnya tes nya di ITENAS dan daerah kesana itu MACET gila. jadi ya gitulah. nyampe sana, nyari ruangan ga terlalu susah. trs tes nih kan ya IPA yg pertama. pake sistem - , udah gt 2 jam wktnya buat 60 soal. *baca: enam puluh* sedangkan UAN aja 2 jam 40 soal. asu2... udah gt kata om gw klo bener2 blank, kosongin aja drpd minus 1 ntar. jadilah, gw ada 13 soal yg kosong. MATI WAE.
tp english lbh gila lg 100 soal bo! *baca: seratus* tp 40 soal pertama *klo ga salah* itu listening. lancar2 aja sih english nya. malah pas udah selese, masih ada wkt buat nge cek. bgs2...
udah gt english yg kedua nih ya: ngarang. jadi dikasi 15 topik, kyk ditanya pendapat kt gitu. min 350-500 kata. nah gw nulis wae. satu lembar penuh, udah gt belakang nya setengah. NAH takutnya max itu 500 T_T mati aja gw klo kelebihan
ah sudahlah. mo belajar buat bsk : MAT dan IPS <- lbh gila lg kan.

nih foto org frustasi :P


ok belajar dulu yaw :D

BESOK! gw kangen T_T

besok.. psikotes sma 3 T_T pake seragam. haha gpp lah kangen gw pake seragam biru putih hehe.
wish me luck..
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah kangen nyokap, kangen ktm, kangen sik (yaah ga terlalu sih), kangen adek gw, kangen kangen kangeeeeeeeeeeeen aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
bosen gila disini belajar mulu (yaah ga jg sih :P)
eh eh eh hari ini gw hari sehat loh ma kk sodara gw haha
kami siang tadi kan ke kampus kk gw (ITB) yaaa sebenernya gw cuman nemenin dy doang sih. wkwkwk.. udah gitu jajan batagor + cilok (kangen gw ama ni makanan) trs singgah ke gramed. tp kgk ada yg bgs -___-" jadi gw cuman beli One Piece 54 yg baru keluar. zzzzzt
sebenernya itu blm hari sehat hehe
pas jam 4.30 kita keluar jogging (sebenernya kk gw yg jogging. gw mah jalan :D) udah gt eeeeeeeeeeh ujan. jadi baru bentar nyampe ke GOR nya, balik deh. nasib ga bawa payung. tp sebenernya klo bawa payung ga lucu jg. sambil lari keliling lapangan kok ya bawa payung. yak tp udah gt nyampe rmh nunggu bntr kita mandi. udah gt makan buah belimbing hehe.. trs skrg gw mo bantuin masak buat makan malem. laper euy..
udah gitu udah gitu kita mo minum teh ijo. hehehe...
lumayan sehat lah :P

kangen,kangen,kangen!

Pengen...

pertama - tama sorry gw dah lama ga update blog :D
dari tgl 8 Mei gw demam. 4 hari doang, abis itu gw positif demam berdarah -__-
yea, tp tidak separah yg kalian kira. 6 bekas tusukan jarum di mana2 dan gw ga usah nginep di rs kok. cuman bolak balik dateng aja.
oke, lupakan yg sudah lewat.
gw sekarang di Bandung, ma meeeeeeeeeen!
sedih sih terakir kali ketemu temen2 gw tgl 11 Mei, daaaan itu bukan hr yg terlalu menyenangkan. pas ultah gw, dan emang seneng bs ngeliet mrk lg. tp gw lg sakit. haha. jadi saya tidak terlalu enjoy dengan segalanya :(
nah, lupakan lupakaaan...
gw kesini skrg mo tes sma 3 dan gw takut. yea, i'm freaking out. gw blm belajar. gw PENGEN bgt belajar tp ya.. begitulah. gw malesnya ntar gw nyesel dll nya itu pasti belakangan. hhh...
mana belin udah di bali, gw ga sempet chat ma dy. oh noooo

btw, i wanna telling2 something.
GW MAU DI TELFON LAGI :( huhu...
hape sialan, lagi di telp jg gw, malah mati. damn it
hape gw... T_T asli kondisi nya makin parah. udahlah, gw emang harus ganti hp. gila, lama2 tombolnya ilang smua tuh.
aaaaaa mau di telp lagiiiiii... tp ga mngkn lah kyknya. aaaaaaaaa wkt itu aja di telp gw shock setengah idup. wkwkwk..

aaah, ngapain yee gw di Bandung? yea, sekarang belajar lah trs klo udah selese tes2 bende2 itu gw ngapaaaiiin? huhuhu... pengen ketemu temen2 lgi... wkt tgl 11 itu gw ga puas sumpah.
yea, tp masa' bbq night nya di rmh remon sih? gw nginep dimane? plg nya begimane? elemeek -_-"
aneh2 aja mrk ni... haduh haduh gw bosen. harusnya belajar tp haha seperti biasa penyakit males menyerang saya. haduh, udahlah segini dulu :D

so,

gw lulus. tp sumpah i need to work and study harder. and HARDER. nilai gw tu sumpah ya JELEEEEEEEEEEEK (walopun gw blm tau brp -__- tp gw yakin jelek)
kayak gini mo nyoba SMA 3?! beuh ga masuk dah! oke, gw off skrg. lagi high mood mo belajar.

okey

tenang. itulah yg harus gw lakukan. bsk tgl 7 loh. pengumuman kelulusan kelas 3 smp loh. haha.

jantung gw... otak gw... mata gw (loh?) semua udah tidak bekerja seperti biasa. stress smua. STRESS.

hr ini gw msk ke sklh lg loh -__________-
remon sih nyuruh bikin laporan MPK. tp ya bgitulah. 15 mnt buat bikin, sisa nya ber jam - jam kita MELEPAK (nongkrong/hang out) di sklh -____________-"

HAHA. GW GA PEDULI LOH!!

bosen sih. bosen banget malah. tapi seru aja. ama ank2 cowo. asli dah ank cewe yg masuk cuman gw ama belin. kami bener2 udah kyk org gila. dan sekarang OFFICIALLY perpus/lab kom menjadi kelas baru kami. emang pewe itu perpus ama lab kom. DINGIN MA MEN.

gw bbrp hari ini menjadi extra lebay memberi respon terhadap semua hal. tp sekarang gw udah lumayan lah tenang. sudah membuat beberapa keputusan. menyedihkan sih keputusannya tp sepertinya memang harus seperti itu. jadi baiklah mari kita biarkan seperti itu.

oh ya, hari ini rada rame yg pake batik ke sklh. seru jg liet SIK warna - warni. gw ga ikutan haha soalnya ga ada batik duongszszsz...

haduh, ga tau mo nulis apa. yang jelas malem ini SEPI GILAAA!! kok ga ada yg ol ya? heran gw.

hari ini, bosen.

TEMAN, mari gw ceritakan sebuah cerita yg sebenernya tidak bisa dibilang cerita karena cerita ini terlalu pendek.
jadi gini awal mula cerita pendek ini: kmrn kan kita masuk sklh nih. padahal kita udah ga usah msk sklh. tp biasalah kita cinta sklh. nah jadi, kmrn kan rada rame tu yg masuk, trs gw udah heboh bilang "eh bsk ga usah msk ya" soalnya gw pikir hr ini ga mo masuk. eh nasib tidak berpikir seperti itu jadinya hr ini gw msti masuk. ya gw sms lah smua BAWAHAN gw :P gw suruh masuk smua. eeeeeeeeeeeh nasib jg ga baik ma gw. hr ini SEPI GILA yg masuk -__- jadi ya begitulah.
trs konflik nya? hr ini gw boseen gila. kan biasa nya kita ke kelas baru kita yaitu perpustakaan ato lab komputer. nah lab kom ntah kenapa hr ini sucks. dan males ke perpus. jadi ya 2000% gw bosen. dan ending nya: akhirnya Pak Yusuf ngasi tu formulir yg udah gw tunggu dr kpn tauk.
nah malem ini barusan gw bosen mari liat foto2 saja

entah knp gw tiba2 mau foto ma hape gw <3

the necklace that my bff gave

sumpah hari yg gw tunggu2

ini jg <3

INI BARU BELI LOOOH WOO HOOO I LOVE IT!!

okehsekiansaja.bye. I LOVE YOU!!!

Waiting

Boys can make you confused. that's for sure.
I know. I guess I'm supposed to not think about this stuffs anymore. but, that person, get in to my mind again. And he confused me. MAKE UP YOUR MIND, DUDE!
mungkin gw terlalu lebay terlalu ge-er apapun lah. tp ya lu nya jg jgn kyk ngasi harapan or whatever gitu dong. ah, ngeseliiiiiiiin!!
gw rasa gw masih blm bisa ngelepasin doi bener2.
haduh, gw pengen cepet2 bebas laaah. klo msalnya trnyata tidak, kan gw bs yaaaah apa lah nyari cowok lain ato kecengan lain ato apa lah yg lain. soalnya gw emang sudah bersiap - siap. tp klo iya yaaa kita lihat nanti lah. tp kan jadinya skrg geje gitu. di tengah2. zzzzzt abis. AAAH! gw tau gak smua cowok begono, tp ya krn begitu ancur dah image smua cowok di pikiran gw.

SUDAHLAH. mari gw menulis hal2 yg lebih menyenangkan drpd hal - hal yang baru saja gw ketik diatas :D
gw lg jatuh cinta ama ni lagu Jepang: Aqua Timez - Sen no Yoru wo koete.
arti lirik nya gilaaaaaaaaaaaaa DALEM. sedalem dasar laut yg paling dalem dalem dalem.

"I found one answer, that even if I’m scared
Even if I’m hurt, I can say “I love you” to the person who I love"

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah gila.

"I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me"

i want to quickly find my Only One :(

Adventure (well. not really)

Bokap gw nekat.
Jadi gini, sekitar jam 4.30 sore klo ga salah gw, gw diajak ma bokap ke Gramedia deket BIP.
Berhubung tujuan utama gw ke Bandung adalah membeli buku, maka gw ikut
TAPI
bokap tiba2 bilang: kita naik angkot aja
gw: (shock)
mak gw: gak mau mama antar aja? (tp mak gw cuman ngomong ke gw)
gw: (mengangguk dgn muka memelas)
bokap: udahlah kami naik angkot aja
Jadi begitulah. gw, bokap, dan adek gw naik angkot jurusan Antapani-Ciroyom.
perjalanan ke sana lancar. kami nyampe dgn selamat. tp ya jalan ke Gramedia nya rada jauh.
dan,
sangat mengecewakan.
sumpah, setau gw terakhir kali gw kesana, Gramed nya lengkap2 aja. tp kali ini gw kesana? oh my, oh my. sumpah ga lengkap. kesel gw. kami ngabisin 45 mnt disitu udah gitu ke BEC.
di BEC beli macem2, termasuk kabel usb buat mp3 gw. soalnya ilang :(
nah, ini nih pas pulang.
gw DULU pernah naik angkot dr BIP. tp yea, seperti biasa, gw ga inget naik apa. kata bokap naik Antapani-Ciroyom jg *sotoy*
jadi kita naik aja nih. daaaaaaaan sumpah, di jalan ga tenang gw ama bokap. liet2 ke jalan terus. akhirnya bokap bilang: bener ga sih ren?
gw: mungkin pa.
gw BENER BENER udah tenang pas udah liet gedung SMA 3 & 5. untung nyampe rmh.
bokap... bokap...

okehdehgwsakitperutnih.byebye!

27-28 April

Kemaren (27 April 2010) gw naik travel dr Jkt ke Bdg. jam 3 berangkat. dan gila, maceeeeeeet minta ampun dah. jam 7 malem br nyampe. gila pantat gw panas di travel nya.
begitu nyampe bdg, udah cipika cipiki ma opung dan kk2 sodara gw, gw MAU tidur nih ya. eh, tp OL dulu. nyampeeeee jam 9an gitu, akhirnya gw nonton film ma kk sodara gw: Weekend at Bernie's. gila ngocol bgt tu film nya. ampe jam 11 apa ya kita nonton. trs mo tidur beneran kan. TAPI, oh tapi. bandung panas gilaaaaaaa kmrn!! mo mati gw. baju tidur gw ampe basah. ckckck

Nah, hr ini (28 April 2010) kerjaan gw tuh: bangun, sarapan, mandi, pergi ke dokter, makan, pergi ke toko foto, balik lg ke rmh, ol. mngkn bntr lg mo ke Gramed. hehehee

bosen deh disini. pengen ketemu temen2 :( kangen gila gw!
mo bawa oleh2 apa ya buat mrk? hmmm *thinking*

oh ya,
ini aja deh hehe :)
love you all. muah muah :-x

this week will be:

1. Fun: I'm in Jakarta, and will be going to Bandung
2. Lonely: I left my best friends in Malaysia
3. Super Cool: I'll meet my cousins
4. Harsh: I need to study, not having fun
5. Gaining weight week -_-

Yesterday, I arrived at Jakarta around 8.00 PM (Jakarta time). My aunt picked me up with her driver. And then we ate dinner at "Baso Malang". Then, we went home to "Ciledeug" *bener ga sih gini tulisannya?* I didn't really like Jakarta, but it's okay. cuz around 3 PM (Jakarta time) I'll be going to Bandung! muahahahaha.. and then, that's when the REAL FUN begin!!

Last one, I just wanna say that I REALLY miss this fellows:

• Delannoy Belin
• Irfan Hanif
• Retnali S.P
• Adelika R.D
  
• Vinca R.R

I didn't say the others not because I don't miss them. but because the list will be to long. sorry guys. Super cool. what? what did i just typed? forget it.

okay,let'sjustenjoyourlifetoday,shallwe?byebye!

we can say it's a good day

my bro is back!! yea, cool. his plane landed at 3 pm. me, my lil bro, and my mom went out at 2.45.
i thought we're late cuz we arrived at 3.30 but, anyway anyhow he just arrived.
the first thing he did when i approached him: hit my head with an empty bottle (with a smile on his face -__-) well, i just laughed along with him
hehehe..
when we're going to fetched him, I am so excited you know! and this is how i look like:

he's so nice that he bought me a purse :D too simple I guess, but that's fine with me.

i have filled it out already :D

this is my old one. he's in a terrible condition

thanks bro! and he also bought this novel:

okayokay,haveagooddayy'all!

bad day

yea, today... sucks
I guess I'll update some more pictures on Kartini's day :(
aaa not in the mood for everything. everything's wrong. I can't smile normally
even the smallest thing that my friends said annoyed me
I'm sorry dudes
I feel like throwing myself far away from my friends
even thought they care about me (I appreciated it guys), I still gave that sulky face. Ah! Goddamnit

seeya

Fun Overload.

well, this is my 60th post :D
I'm going to tell you about today.
Today, our school celebrated the Kartini's Day. So, everyone must wore batik (you know, that cool patterns on the shirt or skirt, or pants from Indonesia). The only problem is: I don't have any.
my Mom have one, but... well, it's mommy style you know. and then I got this idea: LET'S TOOK IT FROM MY BROTHER'S WARDROBE. and so I opened his wardrobe, and the music plays in the back of my head when I found it. Yea, so today I wore my brother's batik. lol.
and school is so much fun today! we took a pictures together with our lovely Math teacher :D we've done a LOT of mistake to her. hahaha..

It's me on the right :D

And then, because none of us wore uniform, WE CAN GO TO CC! hahahaha.. but I didn't play CoD today. I just hang around with them, because I'm too lazy to play CoD. here's some pic:



And then, well.. I went home with Fatina, Retna, and Yanti (Retna's lil sister).

now, about tomorrow, our plan is:
1. Skip school
2. Go to Kuala Lumpur station
3. Go to Sunway Pyramid
4. Eat
5. ICE SKATING!!!
can't wait. it must be a lot of fun. hehe.. too bad Belin can't go with us.

My Bro

Now that I think about it more, I really miss my brother T__T
AAAAAAAAAA
I always feel something is missing and that is my brother
I want to spent more time with him :(
and I will.
I will treasure every moment I have with him.
my bro, I.... *ekhem* love you :D

Today I chatted with him and I felt happy :)
well, can't wait until he returns home
His status in YM is this: "Rumah Sakit" (Hospital in English) and then I asked him: are you in the hospital? and then he said: make it in English but per word.
Rumah = Home ; Sakit = Sick
So his status is: Home Sick
Yea, creative.
That's my bro for sure :D

okaybyebye!

Life: 19 April 2010

First thing first: The family pic is here!!!



Second: I miss Delannoy Belin :(

Third: I'm tired of Boys

Fourth: I don't like all this things and plans

Fifth: It's too tiring

Sixth: I wanna gave up

Seventh: There's no need for the L word

bye:(

beresin lemari, menggila, patah tulang.

okeh, dua kata terakhir dari judulnya emang rada lebay, tp hampir mendekati kenyataan kok gpp.

yang tidak terganggu gugat

kamar gw...

muka gw -_-

jadi gini, gw di paksa nyokap buat beresin lemari. ga mngkn dah gw yg berinisiatif duluan. jadi apa yg gw lakukan:
1. Gw ngurusin kaos2 sialan itu (gw nemu 10an kaos gt yg blm prnh gw pake. wkwkwkwk) trs gw masukin lg


2. Gw keluarin segala macam kemeja dan gw "benerin" kemudian gw masukin lg
3. Gw keluarin smua jaket dan sweater,gw cobain,terus gw masukin lg

4. Gw keluarin smua dress, gw masukin lg

INTI dari smua yg gw lakukan: masukin baju ke dalam lemari.
HASIL nya? Kamar gw yg jadi berantakan
nasib2... Palingan bsk giliran kamar gw yg di surgery. oh iya, trs gw jg pengen beresin rak buku. aaaaaaaaaaaaaa mati aja lah

akhirnya:

DAMPAK nya: kamar gw tambah berantakan + gw sangat capek

okeh,dahsemua!hohohoho